Royal Enfield headlines, explained

 If you set up a Google Alert for "Royal Enfield," as I have, you'll get a fast education in current speech. 

For instance, the headline "Royal Enfield drops limited edition," doesn't mean Royal Enfield is discontinuing a model. It means the opposite: Royal Enfield is introducing a limited edition version of its motorcycles. 

"Drop" now has several meanings, including the opposite of "drop." 

You probably knew that. 

But did you know that a Royal Enfield motorcycle described as having a "Dangerous Engine" is not a menace, except in so far as it has a "powerful engine"? 

Other oddities include variations on a headline that has been appearing around the internet for months:

"Do you know how much a Royal Enfield Bullet 350 cost back in 1986? You will not believe your eyes."

The headline is based on a 1986 invoice for a Royal Enfield Bullet in India, compared to what a Bullet costs today in India.

The implication is that you'll be wowed by how much the Bullet has gone up in price.

It hasn't.

What has happened is that India's rupee has gone down in value. Adjusted for inflation a new Bullet is effectively about the same price it was in 1986.

Who could resist clicking on such an interesting link? And, as long as we keep clicking, the invoice will continue to be discovered over and over again.

It's like that ad that claims to explain why you should put a plastic water bottle on your tire when you park your car.

Anyone watching for internet references to "Royal Enfield" quickly learns that the vast majority of stories online come out of India, where Royal Enfield is respected and far more prominent than it is in the United States.

So a headline that claims "Royal Enfield Bullet 350 Come With Super Engine Like Monster With Killer Look," makes sense in India, but certainly not in North America.

This is an article about a normal 350 Bullet with a look that has not been killing anybody since it was introduced, in 1955. It is no "monster" motorcycle.

Finally there are the articles that gleefully announce that Royal Enfield plans to introduce a modern 250cc motorcycle.

It may be that Royal Enfield plans to introduce a 250cc motorcycle in India. Supposedly the company has confirmed this, and Royal Enfield has, in its long history, produced 250cc motorcycles before.

But I begin to wonder, when so many articles about this include so much speculation, regurgitating the few details reported elsewhere, and are illustrated with photos of the existing 350cc models, "for representational purposes only."

India is a very cost-sensitive market, and the possibility of a coming cheaper and more economical Royal Enfield would tend to excite potential customers.

Stories about a 250cc Royal Enfield therefore make great clickbait.

You'll have to wait for the real thing, but don't worry; you won't miss it when it comes. It will be all over the internet.

He regrets buying back his old Bullet

Read the full story of Paul Jeffries' battle with his Bullet in RideApart.
(Photo by Paul Jeffries)

 "I bought my old bike back 30 years later, and I wish I never had," Paul Jeffries wrote in RideApart last December. The bike was an early Royal Enfield Bullet, and his column was interesting. 

I'm of two minds. 

Was his regret at his recovery of a motorcycle that was once his fondest dream an object lesson for the rest of us? 

Nostalgia puts a high gloss on our happy memories of the past. Can we ever really relive those moments? 

On the other hand, well... who wouldn't like to try to recapture those sunny days we remember? 

Here's his story, briefly: 

"A little over 30 years ago, I owned a beautiful Royal Enfield Bullet. It was my pride and joy, and a real labor of love bike...

"It was also a symbol of my youth and, in a story I’m sure many can relate to, it survived the first child but had to go when the second rolled around...

"That was until one day in 2023 though, when I was looking through eBay and there it was – my bike...

So he bought it back. And that is when the regrets started:

"With each issue that was fixed, another one would pop up...

"The damn thing was cursed – it was like it was holding a grudge against me for getting rid of it all those years ago... "

"Learn from my mistake, and leave those cherished memories of a bike gone by where they belong – in the past."

A truly sad story, and most readers who left comments sided with his feelings. I preferred the one comment that did not:

"You can get that happiness back if you hang in there. It can't stay angry at you forever, and as soon as it's reliable you'll forget the bad times," one man wrote. Is that right?

I essentially "bought" my 1999 Bullet back again by paying a lot for an engine rebuild after 40,000 miles. The mechanic took so long to finish that I bought a Honda I admired to tide me over.

I liked the Honda well enough, but its convenience (electric start for goodness sake!) and reliability couldn't compete with the Bullet's character once they were both back in my garage.

I liked riding the Honda. I WANTED to ride the Bullet. I still have the Bullet. The Honda is gone.

This is going to cost me, I am sure, in time stranded by the side of the road, and eventual repair bills. I am resigned to that.

Going back in time with Motor Cycling

Motor Cycling was a classic British motor magazine.

 I took a walk back in time, recently, determining to read from cover to cover the Sept. 3, 1953 edition of Motor Cycling magazine. 

It was a different time. 

Motor Cycling was the first British motorcycle magazine, launching in 1902, but it tripped and had to be relaunched in 1909. 

By that time its longtime rival, The Motor Cycle magazine, had been in business for six years. 

Motor Cycling was more stable by 1953, with Graham Walker having been editor since 1938. A dispatch rider in World War I, he had an accomplished racing career. He had won the Ulster Grand Prix in 1928. 

Graham would leave the magazine in 1954, but by then Motor Cycling's green cover was well recognized as being "Read Wherever Motorcycles Are Ridden."

His "Editorial" in the issue that fell into my hands assured readers that quality, not the (falling) number of entrants, would assure the survival of the Manx Grand Prix.

As a weekly publication, Motor Cycling's inexpensive paper and lack of color photos are to be expected.

But the depth of technical writing and technical illustrations is remarkable. (No doubt much of this material was provided by motorcycle manufacturers, but it remains valuable, if presumably biased.)

My issue includes an extremely detailed and painstakingly drawn explanation of how to maintain a Model M23 BSA Empire Star.

(Hint: it's nearly identical to the wartime BSA M20 issued to the troops, so your military training during the war remains valid and spare parts abound.)

In general, Motor Cycling tended to feature racing reports, while The Motor Cycle offered more technical articles. Still, my edition of Motor Cycling analyzed the coming 1954 line of Watsonian sidecars, and spent a whole page examining "Lucas Plans for Next Year."

"Sports Gossip" was a column by Cyril Quantrill, who would go on to found Motorcycle News magazine two years later, and edit it during its formative years.

For the Motor Cycling edition I read, assistant editor R.R. Holliday went to the Isle of Man to report on practice preliminaries for the Manx Grand Prix, hanging Motor Cycling's headquarters banner on the Castle Mona hotel.

This was an important sporting event, and Motor Cycling not only provided a map of the grand prix route on the island, it offered advice on the best places from which to watch the action.

Imagine riding the race course on a 98cc moped!

It wasn't all serious, though. There's a page-long humor item by G.K.B., a woman who alleged to have ridden her 98cc Autocycle "Fanny" around the Manx circuit.

"There were no records broken and we were five laps short, but we did it," she wrote.

The true strength of Motor Cycling, in 1953, was its many and varied advertisements. Handsome ads touted brands like Ariel and major purchases like Firestone tires. 

Renold Mark 10 Chains advertised their competition victories.

Vincent invented a clip-on motor with a low center of gravity.

And the Vincent Firefly Cycle Motor showed off its remarkably low center of gravity, with the motor being attached actually below the bicycle's pedal crank. With 45cc of power, this clip-on motor for a bicycle was an odd creation for the same company that made the Vincent Black Shadow.

Royal Enfield was there, with E.S. Motors of Chiswick calling itself the 100% Royal Enfield Specialists:

"We are the largest ROYAL ENFIELD dealers and Spares Stockists in London," E.S. Motors claims, in an ad illustrated with a drawing of a 700c Royal Enfield twin.

Royal Enfield was featured in ads in 1953 magazine.

But the real meat of the magazine was advertisements for used motorcycles and for motorcycling accessories.

Not just parts, but apparel, including RAF goggles, U.S. pattern bomber jackets, and "Genuine D.R. Boots, not new, but in perfect condition." And all available by mail order.

It's in one of these ads that I learn that there is such a thing as a "Jeep Coat," fleece lined and in "Canadian officers' style." Dashing, and likely warm, too.

Perfect for riding your civilian BSA Empire Star.